roses are happier black.

thoughtprocesses.

Friday, November 25, 2005

... i can't think of a title

i woke up really late! today is our philosophy congress and it started 8 am. hahaha. after i have finished my thesis proposal, i started to become obsessed with my bed. i lust for sleep! lot's of sleep especially now that the weather is getting cold. weee.

so maybe you're going to ask what happened to my thesis... well, it's more than 60 pages. i forgot the exact number because i just printed them right away. so far, i still have the longest thesis proposal in our batch - 60 + pages of transcendental pure trash. my thesis proposal is too thick that i have to put it in a short brown envelope because an ordinary sliding folder won't keep it in place. being the only intj person in class, my thesis is a system analysis - pretty much alike wit the works of industrial engineers (i know this because my boyfriend is one). i am the only person in class who will do a system building. when i was rereading my thesis, told him a sick joke, "dapat nag eng na lang pala ako. parehas lang pala. shift na ako sa engineering!"

when i was working at it last monday night, my mom gave me some encouraging words... her lines were so powerful that i really forced myself to finish it as soon as possible. quoting my mom in verbatim,

matulog ka na. saka mo na lang tapusin yan. bukas na lang o di kaya next term. ipasa mo na lang ng ganyan e di pag bumagsak ka ulitin mo na lang next term. hehehehe. sige papayagan na kita na magpadelay ng isang term total yun naan ang gusto mo para makapagconcentrate ka sa thesis mo. hehehehe. tutal immortal ka nanaman kaya kahit ibagsak mo yan di ka na makikick-out hehehe. (2005)

see! i still have the thesis proposal hang-over that i cited her. waaa. thanks mom! that scared a lot of shit out of me. i don't know if she meant it or if she's just using reverse psychology but the important thing is, it urged me to finish my thesis proposal. her words kept on echoing at the back of my mind while i was multi-tasking (eating, reading, typing, and thinking). now i have more juices to put in my acknowledgement page about my mom. hehehehe.

my precious proposal was well paid-off when one of my mentors texted last night to tell me that i have a nice work although he told me that there'd be some minor revisions - typographical errors and the structure of the 'statement of the problem' part of my proposal. as for that part of my thesis, what i did was i presented the main problem to sum up the outcome of my thesis together with three sub-problems to link all the details. aside from that, i also showed the effects of my problem just to add some spice. my mentor, master dennis, told me not to add extra problems to support my sub-problem because for my panelist, it would seem that i'll do a lot of things. however, what sir v, one of my panelists, suggested the other way around. i don't know what the hell am i going to do with my thesis. i'll just let them fight their asses off on defense day.

yesterday was cirilo bautista's poetry night/tribute party. i was invited by the literature department to join since i was one of his students in poetry. they even requested me to do a poetry recital but i rejected it because last week, our org hosted the world philosophy day. i am also having a hard time with my thesis so memorizing a poem would be an easy trip for me to the mental asylum. i never told the head of the literature department what my main reasons were. i just told them that i already have a lot of commitments which needed to be accomplished as soon as possible. it's too vague a statement but effective. however, they still wanted me to come to the party since they already put me in the program. waaa. no one contacted me for heaven and hell's sake! it was my sister who found out that i was part of the poetry thing so i asked sir bayot (^__^) yesterday about it.

speaking of sir bayot, a classmate of mine in literature class told me that he said in class that he missed me so much (^__^) he even asked my friends in class if they can contact me because he needs to talk to me regarding some academic stuff so yesterday after class, i immediately consulted him. he haven't checked my midterm exam yet because he can't understand my handwriting. so, my midterm grade is on pending mode. he asked me if i can read my exam to me on tuesday. pheromones, yehehey! please don't tell my boyfriend. joke. he knows my fetish on gay people and understands my situation pretty well. well going back, since he can't understand my handwriting and i'm going to read to him my exam... herg herg herg... i can tweak my answers... wakekeke joke.

enough with academics! bah! since i don't have classes last wednesday, my mom gave me money to send me away from home and have some fun somewhere. i was on book hunting mode at that time so i went to a different bookstore, bibliarch, national bookstore, and power books. of course a different bookstore is still the best shop for me. i saw books written by derrida, sarte, nieztsche, and wittgenstein on sale. i'm not a shopaholic. in fact, i'm having a difficult time in when i shop. everytime i shop, i always have a thing in mind which i want to buy, however, when i see it, i still think about whether i am really gong to buy it. so i went to dippin' dots, my favorite ice cream store, to think whether i'm going to buy those books, i was thinking and eating ice cream on my way back to a different bookstore. then at my last spoonful of frozen dots, i decided i'm not going to buy books anymore but instead buy some toiletries instead. hmmm... what if o go back to glorietta later? heheheh

~~runaway~~